The Sport Psychology Blog
Do you have goals? New Year resolutions?
It's a nice time to think about these. I don't want to kill the positive thinking buzz you're on....but you should be thinking about your big ugly, self limiting barriers that have been holding you back from fulfillment.
If you have good, strong, big scary goals (the best ones) then you'll have some BIG obstacles and if you want to achieve them you'll have to plow on through some real struggle and growth.
So.... here's the reality:
- You won't fail because you can't "stay positive"
- You won't fail because you weren't "feeling good."
- You won't fail because you don't "want it enough"
You'll fail because you will undoubtedly encounter moments when you're NOT thinking positively, when you're NOT feeling good and when it seems like you DON'T want it anymore... and you'll let those temporary states of mind control the decisions you make in that moment and the next. You'll crave those positive feelings of comfort and confidence. Because they feel good!!! AND you probably THINK you need them to be your best. But that is so wrong.
So... you'll AVOID. Ah the secret pleasure of avoidance. You'll avoid the uncomfortable things required for you to achieve what you want to achieve in the long term.
Avoidance brings immediate pleasure. Comfort returns. Goals drift further away. We slump into our own default mode.
Before you know it...it will take over. I know, i've seen it every year in myself. It will come in the form of things like procrastination, lack of commitment, poor nutrition, avoiding difficult conversations and situations, choosing safety over courage, choosing comfort over valued direction, choosing the EASY path over RIGHT path....And most importantly you'll AVOID EVEN THINKING ABOUT YOUR OWN TENDENCIES THAT HOLD YOU BACK.
Because that feels uncomfortable too - to admit that we're imperfect, that we're "weak" or that we might need help. That means you'll have to admit that maybe you're not the person you try and bullshit yourself into thinking you are. That your discomforts are yours to now courageously confront. Compassionately accept and prepare for all those barriers that lie within you. Plan for those. Take those on - and you might just achieve your New Year Resolution ;)